Saturday, November 10, 2007

The Announcement

I told the boss I was quitting last night. Both bosses actually. We ended up working until almost 9:00pm on a "surprise" competition so it was just the three of us. Because I am taking Monday off - sort of a self enforced holiday, Veteran's Day you know - the boss needed some sheets finished before I left. I was so proud of myself for not blurting it out at a previous time in anger or when I was frustrated. I was really quite calm, and funny even, as I told them when (once we get the permits for this one project - which will likely be February not January as the turtle would suggest) and why (I don't have to, first, and I want to do other things, travel, take some classes, have kids, etc.) and what I would do to help ease the pain so to speak. This means I need to find and train a replacement. Not as easy a trick as it sounds. I realize that I whine and complain about the office a lot. Quite a lot. So much so that when I contacted some friends to see if they knew anyone who was looking for a job or if they were they said "Not if my life depended on it." Ooops. So. If you know anyone with AutoCAD training who might like a well paying job - I never mentioned that this office really does pay well, far above the industry standard if the truth be known, send them my way. Please.
I was a little surprised by the reaction from the boss and vice-boss when I told them. First, the boss asked "are you pregnant?" Rather than get snippy or whatever, I just laughed and said no, but if I was I wouldn't tell him. Then they said an awful lot of nice things about me. I'm not sure if it was because I'm leaving and they don't want to look for someone else or if they feel it's the obligatory thing to say or what. Very complimentary - "hate to lose you," "really hoping you'd make a career here," "shining pillar of an example," (pretty sure that was a joke). Makes me wonder what's on their minds when they yell at me and forget that they were the ones who told me to draw it that way in the first place? Or why I always take it so seriously? It's not like I'm the only one who gets the disappointing, how can we draw that speech. Am I really so touchy? That's something to think about later...
I felt bad for a little bit last night, while they were stroking my ego and hearing the boss sound so old and small. I've flattered myself for these three years that the office would fall apart without me, and while that isn't true I think the boss will miss me. Is that conceited? I hope I can find a replacement who will be generous to the office, not interested in only self promotion and will fill out their time cards like I do. I wonder if there is anyone like me? (That's probably conceited too.) This is the first time I voluntarily left an office, do you know? Previously, I've been laid off and traded. It's a weird feeling this quitting. I don't think I'll miss the office so much once I leave, but I will certainly feel a lot of guilt in the meantime.

This is me, one step closer to Liberation.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Look, you and I, we're rare: loyal to the core, and nearly to a fault. This is a sinking ship. And if it is really the type of firm it should be, then Vice Boss should be stepping up and their own person and their own goals should be happening. Not to knock Boss out of the way, but to further all the hard work that Boss did to get the firm established.

The important thing to know: is that it is the right thing to do for you has already been done. You can't change it. If you are called again, you know where you can lead the charge. You'll be fine.

Rocketgirl said...

There's got to be a skip in your step now, Miz Jane!! You are soooo cloooooose!! I can't wait to see the great stuff you get to do once you are officially liberated. Until then, focus on a happy so you don't get too bogged down with guilt. Like... sleeping in!!!

From Whence You Cometh