Sunday, November 17, 2013

Direct From The FBI

I got this email today and was totally impressed with the detail that the spammer went through to get in touch with me:
Federal Bureau of Investigation
                                  Intelligence Field Unit J. Edgar Hoover Building
                                    935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C.
Attention: Beneficary,
I am Special Agent Erick Bolt from the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) Intelligence Unit, we Intercepted two consignment boxes at JFK Airport, New York, the boxes were scanned but found out that it contained large sum of money ($4.1 million) and also some backup documents which bears your name as the Beneficiary/Receiver of the money, Investigation carried out on the diplomat that accompanied the boxes into the United States, said that he was to deliver the fund to your residence as overdue payment owed to you by the Federal Republic of Nigeria through the security company in the United Kingdom.
Meanwhile, we cross check all legal documents in the boxes but we found out that your consignment was lacking an important document and we cannot release the boxes to the diplomat until the document is found, right now we have no other choice than to confiscate your consignment.
According to Internal Revenue Code (IRC) in Title 26 also contain reporting requirement on a Form 8300, Report of Cash Payment Over $10,000 Received in a Trade or Business, money laundering activity may violate 18 USC §1956, 18 USC 1957, 18 USC 1960, and provision of Title 31, and 26 USC 6050I of the United States Code (USC), this section will discuss only those money laundering and currency violation under the jurisdiction of IRS, your consignment lacks proof of ownership certificate from the joint team of IRS and IRC, therefore you need to reply back immediately for direction on how to procure this certificate to enable us relieved the charge of evading the law on you, which is a punishable offense in the United States.
You are required to reply back within 72 hours or you will be prosecuted in a court of law for money laundering, also you are instructed to desist from further contact with any bank(s) or person(s) in Nigeria or the United kingdom or any part of the world regarding your payment because your consignment has been confiscated by the Federal Bureau here in the United States.
Yours In Service,
Agent Erick Bolt
Regional Deputy Director
Intelligence Field Unit
Despite the spelling mistakes, lack of grammar structure and the insane idea I would forget I was a money launderer, he did remember to copy himself at
I almost want to call the Bureau to see if it's a real person.

This is me and someone found my $4.1 million! Thank goodness, I've been searching for that everywhere...


Cathie said...

I'm impressed with the details! Citing code and everything! Plus the nice touch of 'reply so we know you aren't a money launderer. " Shouldn't have mentioned Nigeria, though. Instant red flag.

ATL said...

Also the "in trouble if you don't call" would give added incentive.

ATL said...

Was totally laughing as she read it too XD

Master P said...

Yeah, the Nigeria thing gives it away. As well as just about everything else, but kudos to that guy!

From Whence You Cometh