It's Back, And Real-er Than Before

It's begun again. Weirder, zanier, far more hype and more conflict and less actual consideration for the conception of the idea, but I watch it, yes I do, because it is addictive. I suddenly understand the obsessions other people have for reality shows. I thought I was above such things because MY reality show was classy. MY reality show had dignity. MY reality show had a point, needed talent, blah, blah, blah. Then last season happened.
And look at what is coming down the staircase in this, the eighth season of Dancing With The Stars.

• I cannot believe they let Lil' Kim on the show. A shout out to "her girls in the pen?!" This is a family show people. Derek Hough is her partner and he won last season but please don't let her win.
• I wonder if Jonathan Roberts asks for the older stars? He is a gentleman and a lot less competitive than some of the other professionals. I hope he and Belinda Carlisle get their partnership in sync. She seems nice and humble - reminds me of Priscilla Presley. Ugly color for a dress I thought.
• Lawrence Taylor has the footwork - like the other football players - and Edyta Slwinska has stamina. That girl REALLY wants to win a trophy. Of course her husband won the first season so I wonder if she wants one to even it up?
• Steve O...all I can say is oh my gosh, and really? And if anyone can relate to - and work with - this guy it is Lacey Schwimmer, so thank goodness she's his partner. His feet were...there. And they moved. But it wasn't the steps he was supposed to be doing.
• The fates have been kind, Cheryl Burke has a young-ish, hot guy. Too bad Gilles Marini is not as famous as some of the others; he could win.
• Oh no. Oh nonononono. Chuck Wicks is dating Julianne Hough?! AND they're partners?! This season is going to be one long soap opera. And not the good kind. TOTAL lift right there at the end of the routine.
• This has officially degenerated into a ratings game. We have a bunny on the show - a Playboy bunny and let me tell you Bruno was drooling all over the desk. Holly Madison, the bunny herself, is dancing with a new pro, Dimitry Chaplin who I know nothing about.
• I don't think I am going to like Chelsie Hightower - she's very Julianne-y. I did love her dress though. And Ty Murray needs to loosen his hips up A LOT. He's so cute and he sounds SO cute. Love the accent. I hope he can work out the footwork.
• Who does Mark Ballas know such that he gets the Olympic Champions? And what is with the beard? Shawn Johnson is very athletic, but she's got to make new muscles work. Mostly the ones in her face. But she's got the elegance, and I liked it. I might have to vote for them.
• Steve Wozniak - there is a man I would not have suspected as wanting to dance. He's going to need some work, but the dance was funny; not totally bad. And WHAT is Karina Smirnoff wearing? P.S. Do they know they have two contestants with the same name?
• David Alan Grier - there is a funny man. I don't think Kym Johnson is sure what to do with the sarcasm though. He's SO deadpan. And I think she's been getting fashion tips from Edyta. It didn't suck.
• Yay, Maksim Chmercovskiy's back! He can be tough, but I love him. And he's so cute and SO good. Denise Richard's needs to save the crying for later in the season when the stakes are higher. And she needs some work. Her feet need some work.
• The producers sure don't waste any time cashing in on new celebrities - and this one has a huge sympathy vote - Melissa Rycroft's been famous for about three days. Tony Dovolani may luck out this time, with the replacement rather than the originally scheduled partner.
• The hosts are back and they are the same, Tom is funny, Sam is sad, so sad. And the judges, oy. Len still offers the most constructive and unapologetic comments, Bruno still needs to be shot, and Carrie-Ann still wants to be young and hip.

This is me, it's all the same reality hype, even dressed up in sequins and heels.